It's kind of funny because I didn't expect to be as sad as I am. I always thought that it wouldn't hurt that much because he's just an animal. I didn't expect to feel such a deep loss. I miss him so much right now, I really do.
I think it's because dogs are so brilliant with companionship. My sister told me to just let it go; she personally believes that animals don't have souls. But I don't agree. Because how, then, do we come to love them so much? How is it that they have the ability to recognize us, to respond to us, to keep us company, to know when we're lonely or sad, and to love us back - if they don't have souls?
Vincent's had a heart illness for some time, and the vet did say that he doubted he would live longer than another year. It's hardly been two months since the time the vet said that, which is one of my regrets. The thing I'm most glad for is that at least he died rather peacefully, surrounded by me and my parents. We were calling his name and stroking his fur because he was looking quite ill, and he wagged his tail once in response right before he died.
People might think I'm crazy for saying this about an animal (my sister certainly does) but I miss him already. He really was loved in our family. And he was very cute and easy to love and, also, so easily and readily gave his love. That's one of the things that makes pets, especially dogs (who are such loyal creatures by nature), so wonderful.
*Sigh* the worst thing is, it's back to the busy and mundane. I have to go to Uni to attend a full day of classes. Afterwards I'm expected to go to work until late in the evening. I have to do my multimedia assignment and finish it before the deadline tomorrow. I have to spend the following days pretending nothing happened at all. The empty space on the rug near the furnace is going to be unsettling for some time.
I have another dog, and since the death she's been sitting outside alone, doing nothing but staring at the birds. She and Vincent used to play together. I wonder if she knows.